Autism: No Two Days the Same

I think it is safe to say, that with Autism, there is never the same day twice. Repetitive motions and actions maybe, but reactions and interactions (unless trained) not so much. If you followed my blog "An Inclusive Community" a few weeks back, I was speaking about "training" the community to work with our students and kids with ASD and helping them learn to adjust their ways to the students instead of our students and kids always adapting to others.

So, we returned to our regular grocery store where we met our new cashier on our last visit. Remember the one who did everything possible to rush us through "his" line?  I was determined to make this trip step two and try once again to go to his line and have the kids practice their purchases and at the same time, reiterate to him that we were here. I wanted him to learn "our" ways in "his" line and let's make this relationship work. Well, of course, he was not there this Friday and my plans to make this gentlemen an inclusive participant in society was not going to happen that day. However, I must say it was nice to have our regular happy cashier Elisabeth help my kids. It is amazing to watch her as she as learned in the last two years to prompt the kids who do not speak with eye contact to say hi to her by remembering their names and telling each one hello and wait for a response. She also has the kids count back the change she gives them and asks if it matches the screen and helps them work through it. This woman is an incredible cashier but an even more incredible teacher. The students respond to her and she responds to them. Social deficits are one of the three core deficit areas of Autism. How wonderful that Ms. Elisabeth knows nothing about Autism, but she knows that interacting with her customers is important, no matter what their ability. So, okay, Ms. Elisabeth is not the norm but I do believe we have come a long way. Human interaction itself is depleting in a world where technology takes us to a keyboard, we text our feelings, or spend our relationships in "U there?" and "BRB". Yet, when we take time to interact with those around us so much more happens.

I am not giving up on the cashier (I'll call him "Joe") that was not there today, who clearly needs to be trained on the social interactions of proper customer service. He will be back one Friday when we come to shop. But, for now I walk away with the satisfaction that my students have made a connection with a very important person in their community who they will see with their parents when they go out in the community that belongs to them.

One of my new parents makes a trip once a month to their old city about 15 miles away just to go to the old grocery store where they used to live.  She told me it made her son feel very good about going out in the community and he loves to go there. Who doesn't want to go where we feel we belong. But then again, sometimes with autism we know that is not the case.  Theory of mind does not lend itself to let some of those with ASD  be able to relate to others and what others are feeling.  However, that should not stop us from trying to make the next trip somewhere the students can belong.

So, I do not know what tomorrow will be like in my classroom, or what next Friday will be like at the grocery store. However, I do know that I will continue to do my best and help the students connect with the community. I also believe that I will go to Ms. Elisabeth and tell her thank you for making our students feel welcome. Thank you Ms. Elisabeth! You are awesome!

Comments Encouraged :)

Do you have a Ms. Elisabeth in your community that helps make your child or students with ASD feel connected?

~Have a wonderful week!